I woke up on this day one year ago just like it was any other day… plus a giant pregnant belly. My due date was July 6, 2017, and I was sure my kiddo wasn’t going to come out on his own. Thanks to gestational diabetes, my doctor was pushing for induction on his due date.
I’d prayed for weeks that I wouldn’t have to be induced. I had others praying for me and was trying every trick in the book. As I got showered and dressed on July 5, 2017, I soon figured out that my prayers would be answered.
I called my husband and told him he needed to get home and bring me to my doctors appointment. After over an hour of bouncing around the waiting room I saw my doctor who confirmed that my little guy was on his way.
At 10:41 pm, my sweet boy made his way into the world and changed my life forever. When I finally got to hold him, I never wanted to let him go. Even after being up since 7am and laboring for 16 hours, I just wanted to stay awake and stare at his sweet, squishy face…. which I did until almost 4am on July 6th, 2017!
A year of motherhood has taught me a lot. I’ve learned more about myself and what I’m capable of in the last year. I’m physically stronger than I thought. Mentally and emotionally stronger. But I’m also more vulnerable.
Motherhood has taught me that marriage is hard. Before we had another little person to worry about, my relationship with my husband was a breeze. Now we have to work day in and day out to make sure we’re staying close and remaining a team. We’re still BFFs and that will never change, but we just have to work at it a little more than we did for the first 11 years of our relationship.
Motherhood has taught me that I don’t actually know it all. As a first time mom, google and random internet pleas were my go to for questions and momentary freak outs. Though I was very equipped to care for a child, I had no clue how to actually raise a child. I had to humble myself and realize that not knowing all of the answers was ok. I’m thankful that I have a great network of awesome moms to lean on when I’m not sure what to do.
Ironically, Motherhood has taught me to relax. The first time my kid ate part of a paper towel, I freaked out and pried that thing out of his mouth. We were both super stressed out after that ordeal. A year in, I figure a little piece of paper towel won’t hurt him. Fiber, right? I’ve realized that I can’t police his ever move and that it’s ok for him to adventure around and even bump his head a little bit. As long as he’s not in any imminent danger, I just need to sit back and take it easy.
Finally, Motherhood has taught me to live in the moment. Enjoy the season I’m in. Life goes so fast. I feel like I blinked and my little 6 pound 14 ounces baby grew overnight into this wild haired, adventurous toddler. Sometimes I find myself longing for the days when he would just cuddle and sleep on me, but then he plays a game of peekaboo with me or hands me a book to read and my heart is so full. I love this stage just as much as the last one. But I know that things can change in a moment and we’ll be on to the next stage of walking then running then reading and riding bikes. I will repeat my least favorite piece of parenting advice: It goes by so fast— enjoy every moment.
The last year has been full of growth, adventure, tears (from everyone) and laughter. Life is so different but in the best possible way. I can’t imagine what life will look like a year from now but I’m so excited to find out.
Happy birthday to the little guy who made me a mom and who brings purpose to my life every day.