Over the last (almost) month, Kailyn and I have been reading Love Unending: Rediscovering your marriage in the midst of motherhood by Becky Thompson. The book was really an impulse buy for me because I’m trying to be more. You know, be a well rounded person who can handle working, mom life, marriage, reading books, listening to podcasts… all of those things.
Love Unending takes you on a 21 day journey to reconnect with your husband amidst all of the crazy mom life moments. Each daily reading is only a few pages and ends with a daily challenge, an opportunity to reflect, and a prayer. I will be honest that I didn’t really “learn” much with this book. Many of these daily applications are things I already try to implement in my marriage. However, having a daily guide helped me to be intentional and really focus on specific areas that may be lacking. This book challenges the reader to remember what she felt like or did when she fell in love with her husband and how to bring some of those things back in to practice.
For example, one of the challenges was greeting your husband like you would have in the beginning of your relationship. My husband and I always made it a priority to kiss each other hello before asking about each other’s day or diving into requests. And then parenthood happened. When one of us got home from work it was, “How was W’s day? When did he last eat? Did you take the meat out for dinner? Can you take the trash out?” and more. Our sweet kiss slowly got pushed back after the requests or didn’t happen at all. Refocusing on this aspect of my marriage and being intentional about reimplementing it has been difficult but necessary. Even something so simple can be a little tedious.
Other challenges in the book include connecting intimately, listening intently, speaking kindly, choosing to spend time with each other, and more. The intention with this is that your practice these things each day, not just one per day. They basically stack up so that by the end of the 21 days you are supposed to practice as many of the “tips” a day as possible.
Personal thoughts… My favorite things about this book were the personal stories added in by the author, very applicable tips, and the daily reads that were quick and effortless. I would have definitely been turned off if the daily tips were things I had to spend money on or excessive time planning. Thankfully, neither of those were the case for any of the 21 days. My least favorite part of this book was the fact that the author references her father every single day. She writes about how perfect he is/was/has always been. I’m just being honest here, but for some reason that bugged me a little bit each day. Not enough to quit the book, obviously, but it was just a little weird.
Overall, I would definitely recommend this book for the mom who is looking to reconnect with their husband but who (like all the moms out there) doesn’t have a ton of spare time on their hands. My husband noticed a difference in how intentional in connecting and communicating I was being over the 21 days of this book and that has made a difference in our marriage. With minimal daily effort, I have helped to improve my relationship with my husband which makes the $10 I spent on this book more than worth it. If you can get past the weird obsession that the author has with her father, it’s a worthwhile read.
What are we reading next? Hot Mess to Mindful Mom: 40 Ways to Find Balance and Joy in Your Everyday by Ali Katz is up next! I will be starting this June 1st. Feel free to tag along!!